Jopen Key Aries Review

Jopen Key Aries - boxThe first time that I saw the Jopen Key Aries was at a blowjob workshop that my partner & I attended while touring the sex shops of NYC. It sparked my interest. An unobtrusive, silicone finger vibe certainly has the potential to make oral sex more exciting. However, it was also easily forgettable. I returned home without a single fleeting thought of this little toy… until Bondage Bunnies contacted me about writing a review.

It’s important for me to be honest & admit that I was hesitant. At the time, their selection of body-safe products was severely limited. In fact, Jopen was one of the only trusted brands available through their site. (Their selection has since grown to include a few fabulous brands such as Doxy & Tantus.) Normally, the lack of body-safe toys warrants an instant “nope” from me. But my personal curiosity about the Aries overpowered my mixed feelings on this one.

Let me be clear: My issues with Bondage Bunnies are not personal. They have been both polite & patient while my health problems have delayed this review. However, as a sex educator who is dedicated to body-safe materials, I have a bit of an ethical dilemma about working with companies that offer toxic toys to their customers.

Jopen Key AriesShould we refuse to support these companies until they take our sexual health seriously? Or should we speak with our money, paying for the products that we want to see more of? 

Everyone has different ideas about what it means to be a responsible consumer, and I can’t make that decision for you. What I can do, as a blogger, is speak up. I can tell my readers to be careful.

There are a lot of products described on Bondage Bunnies’ website as “silicone” which I would bet my vagina are actually jelly. There are toys in their “anal beads” section that contain string (a bacterial nightmare). Some are actually mislabeled kegel balls that can get stuck inside of the body if they are mistakingly used in the butt. And of course, there are anal plugs with insufficient bases or retrieval cords that I would not trust for a second.

Jopen Key Aries - batteryIf you know that you’re buying a product created by a trusted & ethical manufacturer, and you find a great deal at Bondage Bunnies…that’s fantastic! But if you’re not sure, please do outside research. Read reviews from sex bloggers. See what people are saying about the product & the company who makes it. Take a moment to see if other (trusted) retailers stock it. You deserve sex toys that will not cause you harm. 

With that being said, I can finally begin my review for the Jopen Key Aries!

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The Aries is your typical finger-style vibrator: a toy that is worn on the hand to provide effortless stimulation during sex play, usually with a partner. It’s small (slightly less than 2.5″ long, 1.75″ tall, and 1″ thick), waterproof, and uses one AAA battery. Jopen offers it in 3 different colors (pink, purple, or turquoise) — but Bondage Bunnies only stocks pink.

Jopen Key Aries - full packageThe Jopen Key Aries is bean-shaped with a “fin” on one side. It can be held between the fingers so that it rests on the inside or the outside of the hand. It is made of two components: a hard ABS plastic vibrator with a twist-open cap and a thin silicone sleeve. The sleeve is removable, which can make cleaning easier… but it’s also extremely snug and difficult to reassemble. The silicone itself has a matte finish and is ribbed for extra sensation.

This vibrator is your basic one-button model. A quick press of the silver “Key” button turns the toy on. Repeated presses allow you to cycle endlessly through the 5 different settings of steady vibrations, pulses, and waves. Pressing & holding the button for about 2 seconds turns the toy off. When turned back on, it will start from the beginning; it will not remember the last setting.

The small cardboard packaging is tastefully designed with images of the toy and basic product information. Inside the box, you’ll find a short instructional sheet (with information on the one-year warranty) and a travel/storage pouch.

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I wanted to like the Jopen Key Aries. …I really did.

Jopen Key AriesJopen generally impresses me. The Key Comet II is one of the best things that has ever touched my G-spot & the Lust L1 is one of the most underrated & unique external vibes I own. With my recent issues surrounding vaginal pain, I had hoped that this little vibe would be a good first step to bringing sexy back.

If only it had power!

At first, I thought that perhaps the problem was my general lack of libido & arousal. (After all, crippling depression + the impending threat of painful orgasms does NOT make for enthusiastic masturbation.) But then I managed to dig through my vibrators, sifting through the ones that have languished and lost their charge over the last several months, and — SURPRISE! Even the PicoBong Kiki 2 (for which I described masturbating as “an absurd test of endurance”) at least makes my clitoris stand up and demand more.

With the Jopen Key Aries, my clit couldn’t care less what happens next. On a good day, the vibrations feel like I am lightly brushing my fingertips over my genitalia after a good, clean shave. There’s sensitivity, but not pleasure. When I apply the toy directly to my clit, the buzzy vibrations feel good for about 30 seconds before I am completely numb. And if there’s any thrusting going on (with my partner or a sex toy), you might as well be holding a potato to my crotch.

Jopen Key Aries - in hand

My penis-having partner, on the other hand, quite likes this toy. He is much more sensitive to vibrations than I am. (He can even feel them traveling through my fingertips!) And while the Aries still isn’t powerful enough to bring him to orgasm by itself, it certainly increases his pleasure. We’ve found that it makes for a great addition to blowjobs and handjobs, particularly when held against the frenulum, testicles, or perineum. It may not be versatile enough for both of us, but I am happy that it works for him.

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Jopen Key Aries - in boxMaybe I wasn’t being very realistic, but I wanted more out of the $20 Jopen Key Aries. Sure, it’s small and convenient. It doesn’t get in the way during sex. And it only kind of makes my hand go numb from its buzzy vibrations. But there is literally no possible way for me to orgasm with this thing. I had expected a motor that was reminiscent of Jopen’s other toys. And although they do make a rechargeable finger vibe (the Key Pyxis), I can’t say if it’s any better.

With so many high quality external vibes on the market, I feel confident in telling you to look elsewhere. Invest a little bit more money into the delightfully rumbly We-Vibe Tango or Touch. They may be slightly larger, but I actually think that makes them even more comfortable to hold. And they certainly have a better range of vibrations!

2star

Pros: body-safe silicone & ABS plastic, small & convenient design for partnered sex play, waterproof, affordable

Cons: very weak & buzzy vibrations, not rechargeable (takes one AAA battery), may be difficult or uncomfortable to hold for some individuals, vibrations may make fingers numb and/or tingly


Special thanks to Bondage Bunnies for sending me this product free in exchange for my honest & unbiased review. 

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If you would like to purchase the Jopen Key Aries, you can do so here

PicoBong Kiki 2 Review

PicoBong recently released a 2nd, new & improved line of 5 previous designs: the Kiki (mini external vibe), Ipo (finger vibe), Tano (butt plug vibe), Honi (bullet vibe w/ retrieval cord), and Mahana (U-shaped dual stimulation vibe). These revamped vibrators may look exactly the same as before, but they boast one major difference: twice the power!

description textPicoBong is the more affordable/less luxurious sister brand of Lelo. They value body-safety while cutting expenses in other areas: rechargeability, fancy packaging — and laughably pointless extravagance. They have separated themselves from Lelo’s golden dildos, bro-marketed cock rings, and satin penis suits. (Seriously. It’s like they’re getting sex toy ideas from The Onion over there.) Instead, PicoBong’s designs are neon-colored, frill-free, and almost always under $100. If Lelo products were made for rich business executive Barbie, PicoBong is definitely targeting her younger beach-partying sister, Skipper.

PicoBong Kiki - sizeWhen PicoBong contacted me about reviewing one of their new “Power Up” products, I was intrigued. Although I didn’t have any previous experience with their old line, the idea that they had doubled their power — from a single AAA battery — appealed to me. Powerful vibrations are my jam and if I could recommend a halfway decent $40 vibe, I’d be a happy blogger.

The Kiki 2 is a bullet-sized (4″ long, 1″ wide) vibrator with a diagonal flattened tip, created for external stimulation. It is made from hard ABS plastic and is almost completely covered in a thin layer of velvety soft matte silicone. The bottom of the toy (the only portion NOT covered in silicone) twists off to accommodate 1 AAA battery — which PicoBong claims will last 2 hours. It is available in 3 colors (hot pink, turquoise, and black) and is waterproof up to 1 meter. The noise level is advertised as “near silent,” but I’d still suggest a closed door & maybe some light music/TV to drown out the sound if you need to be discreet.

The Kiki 2 has extremely simple 2-button controls: the + button turns the toy on and increases vibration intensity, while the – button decreases intensity and eventually turns the toy off. (Both buttons are “hidden” within the large PicoBong logo embossed on one side.) Honestly, I have no idea how many vibration settings it has. Some online reports for the original Kiki say 18, but I certainly can’t distinguish between that many. I do know that once you have reached maximum intensity, you can then press & hold the + button to cycle through the 12 vibration patterns. Unfortunately, I don’t think that there is a way to decrease the intensity while using the patterns; the – button simply returns you to a constant steady vibration.

PicoBong Kiki - pkg

Included with the Kiki 2 is a small instruction manual & a 1-year warranty. It comes packaged within a very minimal cardboard box with a plastic front and a ridiculous fake history of the toy written on the back.

“Found inside a meteorite in Siberia in 1908, the original Kiki was long kept a state-secret due to the uncontrollable pleasure it would bring to anyone who approached it. It was eventually smuggled out and resurfaced in San Francisco 1967, accidentally beginning the sexual revolution and the Summer of Love.”

I couldn’t make this shit up.

experience textSometimes we have to remind ourselves that optimism should be cushioned with realistic expectations. This is especially important when you are a self-professed power queen with a tiny battery-powered vibrator in your hand. I didn’t expect the Kiki 2 to compare to a wand massager or my beloved We-Vibe Tango. I set the bar low. All I wanted was a relatively easy orgasm; a task that is normally quite simple for me, despite what you would assume from my love of all things strong & rumbly.

PicoBong Kiki - batteryI was impressed when I powered up the Kiki 2 for the first time. At the very least, it makes my Lelo Lily feel like the $100+ paperweight that it is. At best, I would compare it to the Jopen Key Comet II — or perhaps even a buzzier version of the We-Vibe Touch’s lowest setting.

But even though it seemed strong enough, the Kiki 2 did not give me easy orgasms. Before using this toy, I had believed that medium-to-high vibrations were all that my clitoris needed. Broad vs. pinpoint? Buzzy vs. rumbly? I had my preferences, but none of these things seemed to be a deal breaker — on their own. The Kiki 2, however, combines all of my least favorite forms of stimulation: buzzy vibrations, medium intensity, & pinpoint shape.

Actually reaching orgasm with the Kiki 2 requires immense concentration & absolutely perfect conditions. My masturbation session is no longer fun; it’s an absurd test of my endurance — with very strict rules.

  1. PicoBong Kiki 2I cannot use a different (stronger) vibe beforehand, or my clit is desensitized to the Kiki 2’s meager efforts.
  2. I have to spread my labia out of the way & raise my clitoral hood in order to expose as much of my clit as I possibly can.
  3. I have to avoid lube, because it removes the small amount of friction that actually makes the vibration somewhat pleasurable.
  4. I cannot pair the Kiki 2 with an insertable toy, because even the simple act of thrusting a dildo makes the vibrations seem to fade away into the distance.
  5. And most ridiculously of all… I can’t allow myself to get too interested in the porn that I am watching, because it takes the concentration away from my clitoris.

If I abide by these rules for an agonizingly long amount of time, I am eventually rewarded with a very weak & disappointing orgasm. Hooray.

bottom line textObviously, the PicoBong Kiki 2 does not work for my body. But even if I remove my own bias; even if I consider that it could potentially be great for someone who enjoys buzzy, surface-level, pinpoint vibrations… I still have difficulty suggesting it based on the price.

PicoBong Kiki 2It simply does not feel like a $40 toy to me. It may be body-safe, but everything else about it still reminds me of my first $20 vibrator from Spencer’s Gifts. And considering that you can buy some really amazing rechargeable toys for nearly the same price, simply by catching a good online sale… well, I really don’t see this as being a financially savvy decision. (Let’s not forget that the constant need for batteries will drive the price of the Kiki 2 up even more in the long run. Especially since PicoBong warns that using rechargeable AAAs will “result in decreased vibration intensity.”)

I’m all about catching good deals & getting the most bang for your buck — and that’s exactly why I cannot recommend the Kiki 2. There may not be anything inherently wrong with it (if you enjoy this type of vibration)… but unfortunately, there’s nothing outstanding about it either.

2star

Pros: nonporous & body-safe silicone, waterproof, multiple intensities & patterns, easy controls

Cons: battery-powered, buzzy vibrations, doesn’t seem worth the cost


Special thanks to PicoBong for sending me this item in exchange for an honest, unbiased review. 

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Affiliate links have not been used in this post, because none of my affiliates currently stock the updated version of this product.