I didn’t anticipate that I would allow a quarter of the year to pass before I wrote this post… yet here we are. The draft that I started months ago has waited patiently (untouched) until I finally gave in & requested vacation time specifically for this purpose. One week to focus on my side-hustle: to update this site,  catch up on reviews, write my ever-evolving truths, and to immerse myself back into the life of a sex blogger. 

Thank you for your patience & your love. xox

It’s no secret that 2016 was rough — not just on a deeply personal level for many of us, but in a large-scale & heart-wrenching “the world is collapsing” sort of way as well.

In the midst of our ongoing struggle, I want to take a moment to focus on the small accomplishments here at EROcentric. I want to remind myself that the last year also held happiness & success and that those things are still possible in our fight for the future.

2016

I attended my second Woodhull Sexual Freedom Summit and relished in another weekend spent among the life-affirming #BlogSquad. I went on my second #SexBloggerVaca to explore the sex-positive wonders of Chicago — which I still intend to write about. I formed a long-overdue professional relationship with the amazing folks at Smitten Kitten. And with the help of my loyal readers, I was ranked at #98 in Kinkly’s Sex Blogging Superheroes list. (My excitement about the list may have taken a bit of a dive this year, but I do want to give a huge thanks to everyone who voted!)

If that wasn’t enough, my personal life was absolutely bursting at the seams with exciting changes. I attended my first kink event… which was more focused on performance art, but still totally counts! I started a small Gender & Sexuality Book/Film Club with a handful of my friends. I unexpectedly became a leader in my local Sex Geekdom chapter. I finally got my “tubes tied” & stopped taking hormonal birth control, which miraculously solved all of my libido troubles and helped dismantle my depression. For the first time in my life, I even felt secure enough to deeply question my gender identity & sexual orientation.

And perhaps most amazing of all… I got an actual job within the elusive field of sex education! My new place of work challenges me to become a better person & a stronger advocate on a daily basis and I could not ask for a more wonderful group of individuals to call my “teamily.” It truly has become my home away from home.

Unfortunately, with all of these changes & obligations, it was difficult to remain active in the blogosphere. I ended the year with only 19 published blog posts (compared to 2015’s impressive total of 61).

The most popular EROcentric posts during 2016 were…

• My review for the Traz Rhino Sleek & Genesis penis extenders/masturbation sleeves: For the second year running, this post consistently receives more views, comments, and e-mail inquiries than anything else on my site. I must admit that I am torn. I wonder if the popularity is due to good, sexy fun with size play… or if it’s rooted in the more sinister insecurities created by our society’s obsession with penis size. Perhaps this is an instance where two things can be true.

• My educational piece about sensation play: It’s probably no secret that sensation play is one of my absolute favorite activities, but to be honest… I never expected that it would be a topic that so many people crave information on. Now (also after 2 years running), I’m left wondering if I should delve deeper than the basic 101 introduction and just what that would entail.

• My review of the Womanizer W100: An innovative little toy that uses pulses of air to create a suction-like sensation, this product (and those like it) continue to take the sex blogging community by storm. I’m excited to write my review of the Womanizer Pro W500 and see how it compares!

Although I didn’t review a ton of toys this year, my opinions seemed much stronger than usual and varied widely.

My favorite toys included…

• The Lovehoney Desire Wand: A small rechargeable wand that doesn’t provide quite as much power as my beloved Hitachi — but is certainly nothing to scoff at either.

• The We-Vibe Rave: Although I was not a fan of the asymmetrical shape (with a surprisingly sharp edge), the strong rumbly vibrations & super-firm structure really sweet-talked my G-spot.

• The Womanizer W100: I have mixed feelings about this toy, because the air on my clitoris can so quickly switch from incredibly pleasurable to overwhelmingly painful — ruining orgasms like nobody’s business. But its uniqueness is something that I keep reaching for time & time again. And as a sex toy reviewer, that is a fact worth noting.

My least favorite toys were definitely…

•  The PicoBong Kiki 2 and the Jopen Key Aries: Both of these were simply abysmal in terms of vibration strength, reinforcing my fear that there is not a solid battery-powered clitoral vibe in existance.

2017

My biggest goal is to simply blog more.

I currently have a whopping 11 products in my review queue: the L’amourose Rosa Rouge & Prism VII, Tantus Adam & Flurry, Femicorp She*Pak, Womanizer Pro W500, Fun Factory Lady Bi, Crescendo, Nalone Electro Wand, Candy Smart Kegel Ball, and FunToys gPlug. I have not been (and will not be) accepting new products until I can play catch-up.

I also hope to continue writing some non-review posts, which had accidentally become my focus during the latter half of 2016 — along with some slight website redesigns that are an ongoing project of mine. I may even share some infographics & zines that I’ve been working on.

As far as my personal goals go… I’d like to get more involved with my local queer & kink communities — as well as some social justice activist groups. I’m excitedly planning my trip to Woodhull for the 3rd year in a row. And I’m also trying to decide if I’d rather get AASECT certified instead of going to grad school.

It’s a relatively small list this year, but I’m trying to remember that free-time & self-care can be good things; that I don’t have to drown under the weight of my own impossibly high standards and that saying “no” (even to myself) is okay.

For me, 2017 seems to be taking shape as the year of much-needed growth & repair — and I welcome it. 

2015 was a truly amazing year for EROcentric.

I finally decided to take the blog to a more professional level by purchasing my own domain & getting business cards printed. I joined my local Sex Geekdom group. I embarked on my first #SexBloggerVaca, taking a self-organized tour of sex-positive attractions in New York City.  I bonded with members of the #BlogSquad at Woodhull’s Sexual Freedom Summit, where I was no longer “the weird sex girl.” I was just Mandi — in all my quiet, socially awkward glory.

I also connected with a ton of really awesome companies. I started reviewing for a few of my lovely affiliates: SheVibe, Tantus, & Peepshow Toys. I wrote additional reviews for Good Clean Love, Traz Rhino, & L’amourose. (On top of continuing reviews for Good Vibrations.)  And I became a new affiliate of both SexyTimeToys & Lovehoney (reviews in the works).

I was selected as Kinkly‘s Sex Blogger of the Month in January. I was named one of their Top 100 Sex Blogging Superheroes for the second year running. (This time at #26!) And I contributed to their new book, Sex Hacks: Over 100 Tricks, Shortcuts, and Secrets to Set Your Sex Life on Fire, scheduled to be released on January 19th. I was also chosen as one of Beck’s Top 25 Bloggers of 2015. My post, I am a Sex Blogger & I Reject Pseudonymity, was even selected as one of the Top 3 Posts for Elust #70.

I published a total of 61 posts. My most popular of which were…

• My review for the Traz Rhino Sleek & Genesis penis extenders/masturbation sleeves. Although they weren’t right for my partner & I, I’m incredibly happy to see my review helping so many of my readers.
• Sensation Play: Blindfolds, Hot Wax, and Feathers, Oh My!  where I describe what “sensation play” is — including temperature play & sensory deprivation — and provide a few ideas for how to incorporate it into your sexual activities.
• And for the second year running, my review of the We-Vibe Thrill. Apparently, it doesn’t matter if this toy is discontinued or not. And it doesn’t matter that it did not work for my anatomy. People are curious about this little smiling dual vibrator. Perhaps We-Vibe should try again??

Although I only started filling my dedicated sex toy storage last year, a few of the drawers are already nearing maximum capacity. And although I have not personally enjoyed several toys, I haven’t run into very many that I would describe as completely abysmal either. Because of this (and in order to remain positive), I’ll simply stick to naming a few of my favorites from 2015. Keep in mind that these are new to me; they are not necessarily new releases.

• We-Vibe Tango: Even despite its poor battery life & propensity to die prematurely, this remains my #1 (non-wand) clitoral vibrator. It’s the perfect size for remaining unobtrusive during partnered sex and the deep, rumbly vibrations are a godsend for a power queen like myself.
• Jopen Key Comet II: This was the first toy to really make my G-spot sing. The swooping curve & bulbous head (along with the added vibrations) provide intense stimulation that, when rolled side-to-side over my G-spot, overwhelms my body with pleasure. This toy helps bring me to incredibly strong blended orgasms, and I see it remaining a favorite of mine for years to come.
• Good Clean Love – Almost Naked: Not a toy, but an important sexual tool nonetheless. I described this lubricant as “gloriously squishy” and was super impressed with its magical, gravity-defying staying power. It has quickly surpassed all other water-based lubricants in my arsenal and I doubt that I will ever be without a tube.

What’s in store for 2016?

First of all, I’m going to work really hard to catch up on my pending reviews, including: the Luxe Mio by Blush Novelties, the Perfect Plug Kit by Tantus, Lovehoney’s Main Squeeze Heavy Double Kegel Balls, and the Rosa Rouge & Prism VII by L’amourose. There’s also a few other self-purchased toys that I have neglected to review in the last year, but still really want to rave about.

I’m going to try again to record my orgasms & sexual activity, which will hopefully lead to a very nerdy infographic post in another year’s time. I would also like to get back to writing more non-review posts, which I took a bit of a break from during 2015. I’m still considering doing videos as well…if I ever find my bravery.

Most of all, I want to continue to put myself out there and get more involved in the sex-positive community — both locally & globally. I’m starting my own sex & gender book/film club with a few like-minded friends. I would like to find an organization where I could volunteer while I am figuring out how to achieve my more professional goals. I plan on attending some local kink meet-ups & workshops. I really want to try a pole dancing class. And of course, I’m looking forward to attending Woodhull’s Sexual Freedom Summit 2016 (and perhaps even Kinky Kollege).

Here’s to another year of shamelessly writing about sex!