Reflections & Goals of a Novice Sex Blogger

2014 was my first complete year as a sex blogger, and I must say that it has been a very exciting & positive experience. I’ve learned a lot — about sex, writing, the internet, and best of all, myself. I’ve discovered a lot of amazingly talented & brilliant bloggers who inspire me on a daily basis. And I’ve made some satisfying progress towards several of my goals (including a few that seemed really far-fetched).

If you’re new to EROcentric, here’s a bit of a recap…

I published a total of 49 blog posts this year, which was very close to my original goal of one-a-week. My most popular were…

  • We-Vibe Thrill charge6 BDSM Principles That Vanilla Couples Should Followwhere I exalt the basic tenets of healthy BDSM involvement as aspects that would benefit any intimate relationship.
  • My review for the (discontinued) We-Vibe Thrill, which was my first dual stimulation toy. Unfortunately, it continues to spend most of its life in the back of my toy drawer.
  • I also received an overwhelming amount of support on Confession: My Sex Life Isn’t Perfect. It was a difficult post for me to write, but I’m really glad that it has touched other people on such a personal level.

I got really serious about body-safe sex toys this year. I tossed out my old, questionable items and started building a collection that I could trust. In just one year, I’ve added approximately 20 new toys — outgrowing our nightstands & necessitating the addition of dedicated storage-space in our bedroom. And while I didn’t feel like I had completed enough reviews to make a Best & Worst of 2014 post, I did have a couple of favorites.


  • The Hitachi Original Magic Wand continues to be my go-to vibrator for effortless multiple orgasms. It’s perfect for when I need quick stress relief, or when I’m simply struggling to reach my peak. Plus, it makes for great back massages.
  • I have also fallen madly in love with Tantus. Their G-Spot “Vibrator” was the first toy that stimulated my G-spot without being uncomfortable to insert or thrust. And their Ripple (small) plug proved to me that anal play can be very pleasurable.
  • Last but not least, the Shunga Massage Candle has become a bedroom essential for my partner & I. It’s such a simple item, but it’s one of my absolute favorites for sensation play.

topbloggers_2014_large_tIf you’ve been following me elsewhere on the internet, you might have noticed that I finally started an Instagram account. (Full of sex toys, cats, books, & the occasional photo of yours truly.) You may also recall that back in October, I asked my readers to consider voting for Kinkly‘s second annual list of Sex Blogger Superheroes. I was very honored (and surprised) to come in at #33 on their Top 100 list this year. This was by far my biggest accomplishment, and one that nearly had me in tears of joy!

When I wasn’t working on the blog (or at my job), I tried to go on as many adventures with my partner as possible. Our biggest trip this year was to Austin, TX where I became extremely jealous of their liberal atmosphere. We visited a couple of awesome sex stores (my favorite of which was Forbidden Fruit) and witnessed an amazing performance of Bedpost Confessions, where Holly Lorka told a crowded room about discovering her pornstar vagina. It was an experience that had me laughing until I was crying, and it inspired me to be more open about my own sexual experiences.

In my academic hiatus, I’ve also discovered the amazing world of massive open online courses (MOOCs) and have become a total sex nerd. So far, I’ve completed Saylor’s Gender and Sexuality course, as well as two classes through Coursera (Contraception: Choices, Culture, & Consequences and Abortion: Quality Care & Public Health Implications). I’ve enjoyed reading articles and taking notes way too much.

What’s in store for 2015?

upcomingReviews are one of the easiest, most stress-free posts for me to write… and with a recent family illness, I desperately need that lack of pressure. So first and foremost, I plan to start the year by focusing on reviewing more items. (This is not to say that I will stop writing educational and advice-oriented guides — only that those posts may be delayed while I cope with other stressors.) I’ve got a few amazing toys that I really need to gush over (pun intended), and many others that need more experimentation.

As the year progresses, I look forward to working with more awesome companies, testing more products, and (as inspired by Sexologist Vixenne’s 365 Days of Orgasm) keeping track of my orgasms along the way.

One of my biggest goals for the new year is to put myself out there & become more active in the sex blogging community. In the last couple of days, I’ve taken small steps by creating accounts on both Tumblr and Pinterest. I was also lucky enough to be chosen as Kinkly’s Sex Blogger of the Month for January. In the coming months, I plan to participate in more blog memes and round-ups (specifically Toy With Me Tuesday & Elust). Who knows, I may even start utilizing my Youtube channel.

Professionally, I want to make 2015 the year of serious grad school preparation. I’m going to start working through my GRE practice tests and contacting individuals for advice. Ideally, I’d like to make a couple of campus visits this year as well. If I can schedule those visits around a sexuality conference or two, that would be especially awesome. (I’m leaning towards CatalystCon or Woodhull’s Sexual Freedom Summit at the moment.)

I want to thank all of my readers, and my fellow bloggers, for all the support you have given me. Here’s to more amazing adventures and learning experiences as we enter the new year. xox

Tantus G-Spot Vibrator

Tantus G-Spot Vibrator [review]


Tantus G-Spot VibratorThe shape is what intrigued me most about the Tantus G-Spot Vibrator. Made specifically for G-spot stimulation, the toy features a prominent bulbous head with a rather gentle curve. For additional stimulation to the vaginal entrance, there is also a slight dip located a little lower than halfway down the shaft. (For someone with a shallow G-spot, this feature may go unexplored.) Although not huge by any means, the toy is on the larger end of average. It has a near-constant diameter of 1.5″ and an insertable length of 7″.

Anyone who is familiar with Tantus products will know that although this toy is labeled as a “vibrator,” it’s really just a vibrating dildo. That is, it has a hole in the base that will accommodate a vibrating bullet. Tantus provides a basic silver bullet that can be used with any of their “vibrators.” However, it is a pretty standard size and can easily be swapped with many other vibrating bullets.

The G-spot Vibrator was one of my first Tantus products, and the very first thing that I noticed is just how hefty it is! It’s 100% high-quality silicone — and it is thick, firm, and heavy. Attempting to “squish” the silicone anywhere other than the hollow base is practically impossible. And although the toy definitely flexes, touching one end to the other is out of the question. The silicone itself is shimmery, but has a matte finish that creates a lot of drag if not sufficiently lubricated. The good news is that it attracts a very small amount of dust, lint, and hair.

Tantus G-Spot VibratorI ordered my G-Spot Vibrator some time ago, when the pink color option was still available as a Closeout item. (It appears that it’s now only being produced in purple.) Therefore, I believe that I got what is now considered the “old style” Tantus packaging. Despite some design differences, both packaging styles have a lot of similarities. Tantus is very good at keeping their packaging gender-neutral & surprisingly nonsexual. It’s a simple plastic clamshell design— focused on basic transportation, not long-term storage. With partial transparency, it is not ideal for those worried about discretion, but it does provide a nice glimpse of the toy before opening.


Tantus G-Spot VibratorThe shape of the Tantus G-Spot Vibrator is just as awesome as I had hoped it would be. The rounded head effortlessly locates my G-spot, and the curve is not so intense that it “catches” on my pubic bone when thrusting. If you prefer idle pressure for G-Spot stimulation, the silicone is firm enough to apply adequate amounts — but obviously not as unforgiving as materials like metal or glass. For this reason, it could be a good alternative for individuals who want to experience G-spot pressure, but who typically enjoy soft sex toys.

I do suggest that you have a bottle of long-lasting lubricant nearby, as this particular silicone blend creates a lot of drag and can feel rather dry. Also, because of its size and shape (namely the bulbous head), insertion can be a little difficult if you are accustomed to smaller sex toys. Warming up with other, smaller or more tapered toys can help with this. However, I still commonly experience a brief moment of discomfort as the head “pops” past my vaginal opening. This discomfort is very mild, and the pleasurable sensations that I experience once my body adjusts to the toy totally make up for it.

Tantus G-Spot VibratorAs far as vibration intensity goes, the one-speed Tantus bullet is okay — but nothing outstanding. The silicone is very thick and while vibrations can still be felt in the tip, they are definitely muffled. I suggest a super powerful bullet, like the We-Vibe Tango, if vibration is what you’re after. If you’ve never owned a toy with a hole for a vibrating bullet, be aware that insertion is easy…but removal can be a pain. Adding a small amount of lubricant to the hole and/or the bullet can help, but to be honest, I usually just forgo the vibration capability altogether. It is an awesome toy — even as a simple dildo, and I usually don’t consider added vibrations to be worth the hassle.

Would I suggest the Tantus G-Spot Vibrator?

Definitely! While I have yet to experience female ejaculation, or an orgasm from G-spot stimulation alone, the Tantus G-Spot Vibrator was my first toy that made it seem like a real possibility. It may not be one of Tantus’s most talked about products, but it is one of my personal favorites.

Unfortunately, the G-Spot Vibrator is no longer available at a Closeout price through Tantus‘s website. And I will admit that at $85.96, it is a little steep for someone on a budget. However, there are cheaper options: Shevibe offers this toy for only $72.99, and Pink Cherry currently has it on sale for an extremely reasonable $38!


Pros: made from Tantus’s premium silicone (non-porous & body safe), bulbous head is perfect for G-spot stimulation, has a hole in the base for the option of adding a vibrating bullet

Cons: silicone creates a lot of drag, may be too soft for someone who enjoys rigid toys for G-spot stimulation, insertion may be uncomfortable for some because of size/shape, price can be steep if not on sale

Tantus Ripple

Tantus Ripple – Small [review]

If I’m being perfectly honest, I have never found anal pleasure to be really pleasurable. It’s always been more of a mental turn-on: the feeling of submission and vulnerability that comes from being the receptive partner, the slight taboo of anal play in general. But as far as pure physical pleasure goes? Meh. It’s okay. At least that’s how I felt before trying the Tantus Ripple.


Tantus RippleThe Tantus Ripple is a slender toy with 4 rounded “bead-like” shapes that gradually increase in size. The new model also has a very thick, round base to prevent it from accidentally getting sucked inside the rectum. (Because a trip to the emergency room to get something removed from your butt is never fun.) Made from one solid piece of Tantus’s premium silicone, this toy is completely body-safe and non-porous. Obviously, porosity is a very serious concern for anal toys because of the potential for bacteria growth. The Ripple can be cleaned with soap and water, wiped down with a 10% bleach solution, boiled, or even put in the top rack of a dishwasher. It offers a great safe alternative to traditional anal beads, many of which are made from questionable material and/or connected with an impossible-to-clean cloth string.

The Ripple comes in two sizes: large and small. The large has a diameter ranging from 0.8″ to 1.5″ with a total length of 6.85″. The small has a diameter ranging from 0.5″ to 1″ with a total length of 4.95″. My review will be based on the small, because that is the only size that I have personal experience with.


Tantus RippleDespite some previous anal play, I still consider myself a novice — especially in the size department. I’m meticulous about toy dimensions, because I know that even a plug that is considered “small” can cause me some mild discomfort at its widest point. The small Ripple, however, is entirely unthreatening. In fact, the most difficult part about insertion is not about size — but flexibility. Although the silicone itself is rather firm, the toy is so narrow that it bends easily. Once lubricant is added, you have a very slippery toy that does not stand up to pressure. The easiest method of insertion seems to be to hold the Ripple very close to the first “bead,” so that you can firmly guide the tip into your body. After that, controlling the toy by holding onto the base becomes much easier.

Because of its rippled shape, but overall very small size, this toy begs to be moved. If you’re looking for an anal plug that will give you a feeling of “fullness,” the small Tantus Ripple will almost certainly not satisfy you. Even when paired with an insertable vaginal vibrator or worn during PIV intercourse, it may not provide any additional pleasurable sensation. It’s simply too unobtrusive. Also, if you enjoy wearing anal plugs during your daily routine, the large round base can make sitting and walking a little awkward and uncomfortable.

No, the real joy of the Tantus Ripple is in the sensation you get from thrusting — especially since the shiny silicone stays lubricated very well and does not create any drag. (It does, however, attract a lot of dust and hair in storage.) The varying sizes of the bead-shaped forms provide a lot of stimulation, especially near the opening of the anus. For me, it created a very pleasurable full-body tingling sensation that was almost epiphanic in a “So this is why people like butt play!” sort of way. Still, I can see how someone else might consider this sensation overwhelming or maybe even irritating. Instead of a constant thrusting, some individuals may prefer to wait until the moment of climax to remove the Ripple, or simply allow it to naturally be pushed out of the body during orgasm.

Tantus RippleWould I suggest the Tantus Ripple?

Yes, yes, yes! I believe that the small Tantus Ripple is a truly fantastic toy for anal beginners. It’s body-safe, it’s very small and unthreatening, and the different sizes of the ripples allow for a person to test their physical limits while also safely stopping at any time. Plus, with a larger version of the same toy on the market, there’s always the opportunity to move up when you’re ready for bigger plugs.

Best of all, the Tantus Ripple offers very high quality at a reasonable price. Through Shevibe‘s website, you can purchase the Ripple Small for $29.99 and the Large for $35.99. (Both sizes have the color options of black or midnight purple.) Ordering the standard colors directly from Tantus‘s website is a little more expensive. But if you are interested in the small size & comfortable with receiving a random color, you can save even more money by ordering through Tantus’s grab bag section for only $16.99! At that price, it’s totally worth a try if you’re even the tiniest bit curious about the “anal bead” sensation. You can also find the Ripple in both sizes at Peepshow Toys.

Tantus Ripple

Pros: non-porous & body safe silicone, thick round base, perfect size for beginners, very affordable options

Cons: may not be ideal for individuals who prefer “fullness” to active anal stimulation


Pop Top Deluxe Silicone G-Spotter [review]

If you’ve read my review of the Hitachi Original Magic Wand, you already know that I absolutely love it for clitoral stimulation. I love it so much that I’ve made an exception for it: It’s the only porous toy allowed in my bed. What can I say? It makes me orgasm quickly and consistently — and I am forever grateful.

Ever since my first time using the Magic Wand, I’ve wondered how that vibration intensity would feel internally. In fact, I even purchased a cheap PVC G-spot attachment before bloggers like Dangerous Lilly schooled me on material safety. I used it a few times, decided that it felt awkward, and questioned why I kept allowing it to take up space in my drawer.

Still, I couldn’t let go of the idea. I was certain that if it were made from higher quality material and shaped in a slightly different way, an internal attachment might feel really nice. So when Good Vibrations offered to send me the Pop Top Deluxe Silicone G-Spotter, I was overjoyed!

First Impressions & Description

Pop Tops boxPleasure Works’ Pop Top Deluxe Silicone G-Spotter comes in a simple (and gender neutral!) cardboard box. It also comes in two fairly neutral colors: purple and black shimmer. Although my review will focus solely on G-spot stimulation, this toy can also boasts that it can be used to pleasure the prostate.

As the name states, this attachment is made from silicone — meaning that it turns the Original Magic Wand into a non-porous toy! The silicone itself is softer than other silicone toys I own. (For example, it is much squishier and more flexible than the Tantus G-spot vibrating dildo or the Lelo Ella.) This flexibility and stretchiness allows the Pop Top to fit snuggly overtop the head of the Magic Wand, while also being very easy to add & remove. The silicone also has a somewhat matte finish which attracts dust and hair like nobody’s business.

Pop Tops Deluxe Silicone G-Spotter (left) vs. cheap PVC G-spot attachment (right)

Pop Top Deluxe Silicone G-Spotter (left) vs. cheap PVC G-spot attachment (right)

Compared to my old “Gonzo-nose” PVC attachment, the Pop Top G-Spotter looks much more appealing. The attachment itself is larger (5″ of insertable length with a 1 3/8″ diameter), the curve is ever so slightly more pronounced, and the tip is rounded and cushiony so that it gently rubs the G-spot rather than just poking at it. It even has a small nubbin for clitoral stimulation.


When I first attached the Pop Top Deluxe Silicone G-Spotter to my Original Magic Wand, I immediately noticed two things: (1) It transferred vibrations without a disappointing decrease in intensity, and (2) It somehow made the Magic Wand even louder. (Luckily, the only other inhabitants in my apartment are my partner and 2 cats, none of which bat an eye at vibrator noise — even when it sounds like a lawn mower.)

Because the internal portion of the Pop Top G-Spotter is smooth, flexible, and relatively small, it was both easy and comfortable to insert — even without a warm-up. Always skeptical (but yet excited) about dual stimulation toys, I immediately focused my energy on positioning the wand so that both my G-spot and clitoris were receiving vibration. Unfortunately, I quickly realized that this wasn’t going to work for my anatomy. The space between the clitoral nub and the G-spot arm is less than 1 inch. For me, this means that if I have the internal portion fully inserted, the clitoral portion rests much too low for pleasurable stimulation. However, if your G-spot is more shallow or your clitoris is located closer to your vagina, dual stimulation may work for you.

Hitachi with Pop Top G-SpotterForegoing the idea of clitoral stimulation, I shifted my focus to the G-spot. Everyone knows that the Original Magic Wand is heavy and cumbersome. So if you enjoy thrusting your toys, be prepared for a workout. The constant motion made my arm get tired rather quickly, especially with vibrations traveling up it. (Also, the increased movement makes the neck of my Magic Wand creak rather annoyingly — adding even more noise to the lawn mower vibrations.) If pressure is your pleasure, take a moment to watch my video clip and see how flexible the silicone is. One of my concerns was that the material would give too much… and unfortunately, I was somewhat correct. So far, the only way I’ve discovered to combat the issue is to use my free hand to cup the head of the Magic Wand and press it against my body. Of course, this causes my hand to get the full force of the vibrations.


I don’t want it to seem like I don’t enjoy the Pop Top G-Spotter though, because I do. I find all of the annoying little obstacles and problem-solving to be worth it. Because I’ve discovered that if I switch to the high setting, and press the head of the Magic Wand firmly against my vulva, this attachment feels amazing. It has even led me to experience my first orgasms without direct clitoral stimulation — and in typical Original Magic Wand timeliness too! (I’m going to take the “I’ll know it when I feel it” stance on G-spot orgasms and suspect that the vibrations here are so strong they are simply stimulating the clitoris internally.)

Overall, if you enjoy the strong vibrations of the Original Magic Wand, I highly suggest purchasing Pleasure Works’ Pop Top Deluxe Silicone G-Spotter. For only $40, you get a body-safe internal attachment that provides you with more variety for an already awesome toy.


Pros: non-porous & body safe silicone, easy to attach and remove from Original Magic Wand, transmits vibrations very well, comfortable shape for insertion & G-spot stimulation, cheap way to add variety to an old favorite

Cons: makes Original Magic Wand even louder, clitoral nub might not work for everyone’s genital anatomy, size and weight of Magic Wand can make thrusting difficult, silicone may be too flexible to provide desired pressure

A big thanks to Good Vibrations for providing me with this product free of charge in exchange for an honest review! 

We-Vibe Thrill charge

We-Vibe Thrill [review]

I’ve been anxious to get my hands on a toy that offers dual stimulation for quite some time now. However, I’ve read enough reviews to know that dual stimulation toys only seem to satisfy a select few. I simply was not willing to risk a ton of money on a (body-safe) toy that may not align with my anatomy — or lower my standards for a cheap, but unsafe alternative. So when PinkCherry put the $130 We-Vibe Thrill on sale for only $30, I jumped at the opportunity!

First Impressions & Description

We-Vibe Thrill BoxThe We-Vibe Thrill comes in a sturdy cardboard storage box with rather nice, subdued product art and information. (If you require a certain level of discretion, removing the thin slip-case leaves you with a plain ruby box with only the product name visible.) Inside is a layer of foam that securely holds the toy itself. Underneath this layer of foam is where you’ll find the user manual, a travel/storage pouch, and the magnetic charging port with an included USB cord. (If you don’t want to rely on your computer for charging, I highly recommend purchasing a simple USB wall-adapter.)

We-Vibe Thrill packageI was pleasantly surprised that my charger was different from many of the older black ones that I had seen (including the one pictured on PinkCherry’s product page). Gone are the days of struggling for a strong magnetic attachment. Now, the We-Vibe Thrill simply stands on top of a magnetic base for it’s 90 minute charging time. (Each of which will give you approximately 2 hours of play.)

We-Vibe Thrill charge

The Thrill itself is mostly made of high-quality (non-porous & body-safe) silicone in a deep magenta or “ruby” color, with a small area of silvery hard plastic on the clitoral portion. It is completely waterproof, making it very simple to clean with soap and water.

There are 8 vibration modes to choose from: 4 constant vibrations of increasing intensities, 3 pulse settings (one that alternates between strong pulses and lighter but faster ones, another that just has constant & consistent quick pulses, and one that varies in a Cha Cha ChaChaCha pattern), plus one “wave” vibration mode. At its strongest (Ultra mode), the Thrill reaches 4800 RPM, making it quite strong for such a small toy — but also surprisingly quiet.

There is only one control button to simultaneously control both motors, which is located in between the magnetic charging connectors. This button will cycle through the various vibration modes and then turn off when pressed repeatedly. You can also turn off the unit by holding the button for 2 seconds. (If turned off in this way, the Thrill will resume your last vibration mode when turned back on.)


ComfortOne of my initial concerns was one of comfort. I didn’t know how flexible the silicone would be and was curious if insertion would be awkward or difficult — or if the C shape would feel tight during use. Turns out, while the Thrill is indeed firm, the middle is also very bendy. Not only was insertion easy, but I also found that it is super comfortable in both reclining and sitting positions.

VibrationsIt’s no secret around here that I enjoy rather strong vibrations. The Thrill actually surprised me with its intensity. The silicone seems surprisingly good at transferring vibrations. In fact, I actually wish that they would have made the handle out of hard plastic and kept the clitoral stimulator silicone, as the plastic seems to muffle the vibrations too much in its current location — while my hand has gone a bit tingly a couple of times. As for the pulses? I’m normally not a fan, but I’m actually digging experimenting with some of the unique variations that the Thrill has to offer.

AnatomyThe all-important question when dealing with dual stimulation toys. Did the We-Vibe Thrill “work” for me and my genitalia? …Kind of. While it’s not completely impossible for me to get both vibrating motors in exactly the right spot, it is difficult to keep them there. This leads to a lot of extended teasing and ultimate frustration on my part as I continuously lose the perfect positioning. I’ve also noticed that if I do manage to get close to climaxing with the Thrill, it becomes increasingly difficult to keep the small, lubey G-spot end from being pushed out of my body.

Which reminds me… If you require a lot of pressure for proper G-spot stimulation, the little bump on the We-Vibe Thrill probably isn’t going to cut it. And while I have seen at least one review that suggested intercourse with this toy was possible (like the original We-Vibe), I would definitely not advise that for everyone. The mere attempt at providing pressure to the G-spot end with fingers was too uncomfortable for me to try again any time soon.

Would I recommend the We-Vibe Thrill? 

We-Vibe Thrill

I want to like this toy. I think it can provide some pretty glorious sensations when it’s working as intended, but for me…unfortunately, that is a rarity. Will I keep playing with it, experimenting to see if anything improves? Yes, at least for a while longer. But I’ve accepted that it may always be a warm-up toy and nothing more. My advice: if you’re looking to purchase the We-Vibe Thrill, keep your expectations low. If it ends up easily stimulating both your G-spot and clitoris, you’ll be pleasantly surprised!

Overall, the Thrill (just like a lot of other dual stimulators) is a risky purchase — one that I don’t think is worth the regular $130 price tag. But if you’re curious and can find it on sale, by all means go ahead and give it a try.


(Most websites have now removed the We-Vibe Thrill from their inventory, as it seems to be officially discontinued.) 

We-Vibe Thrill smile

It’s kind of adorable though… the way it just keeps smiling at you.